Episode 19 - Introduction to the Will Center

Transcript

Hi friends. Welcome back. Okay. In this episode we are talking about the will center. So the will center is about ego, willpower, integrity, self-worth, resources, and it's also a motor center. About 65% of the population has this center open, which means. That most people are not designed to commit with their willpower and have it unending.

You know, we have this idea that once we commit, we stick with it. Or you know, once we decide we're gonna go on a diet, we're gonna stick with that. And if we veer off of that path in a couple days, we see it as failure. And it's not failure. It's just that we're not designed to have this unending willpower.

, the majority of people are not. And so when you hold yourself to that, you know, expectation, you're kind of setting yourself up for disappointment. And this is where self-worth and value can suffer. Because when we think that we're failing at things because we can't stick with it, , it makes our, value and self worth, Feel like it's less than it really is.

And, and honestly, your value does not, and your worthiness does not come from how much you do. So let's just end that. Let's squash it right here. Because you are worthy inherently. Just because you exist, you don't need to do anything to be worthy of love and respect. And we just need to put that to rest because it's, it's nonsense.

So, If you have an open will center, it's important for you to get acquainted with the phrases. I'll try. I'll see what I can do. I'll do my best, but I can't promise I'll meet that deadline if it's not your deadline. You know, rather than saying, I promise, because when you say I promise, and you don't live up to that, other people judge you for it.

You judge yourself for it, and nobody wins. But if you say, I'll try, then you're doing the best that you can. And if you don't meet that goal, then you inform the people that you can't do that, that you're not gonna meet the goal. And this is where boundaries and communication really come into play.

Because when you can say, really intended to get this done, and it looks like I'm not gonna meet that goal, what can we do to shift these priorities around? Or can somebody else help? The job can still maybe get done, but you take that pressure off of yourself. So it's important that you know that you're worthy just because you exist and that it's not about how much you do and that you need to be careful with your language to not overcommit.

The other thing is that if you have an open will center, you become really wise over time, who, can keep their word who says that they will do something and that they will do it because those are probably the people who have. Defined will centers, and when they decide to do something, they will do it until they decide not to.

So about 35% of the population has a defined will center. They have consistent, energy in their willpower, but it does need cycles of rest. So it doesn't mean that it's indefinite forever. However, if you have a defined willer and you decide to do something, That willpower will remain a driving force until you decide that you're done with it.

This can be hours, days, weeks, months, years. It can be a long time, but really this center needs cycles of rest. So knowing when to give up, knowing when to take a break, knowing when to pause is really important. If you have a defined willer. You also need to understand that other people can't commit in the same way that you can just because you can commit and you can give up sugar and just go, you know, hardcore on it.

Like no sugar, no exceptions doesn't mean that other people can, and so you can't judge other people for not being able to, live up to that same standard because they're not designed that way. Even you need to have cycles of, rest and fluctuation. And so, you know, building that into your life is important as well.

You know, you can burn out just because you are, so dogmatic about your approach to willpower and committing to things, but you also have to remember that you're just human and that cycles of rest are really important. So, Be kind with other people when they can't follow through with commitments.

Remember that they don't necessarily have the same willpower that you do and you know, let them commit to the level that they are able to, and know that you kind of have a superpower in this at times, but it can also be a detriment that you overpower other people. So be careful. Especially in conversations, maybe especially with children.

If as a parent you have a defined will center and your child doesn't, they may feel really run over by you in every conversation because yes, short term, they can amplify your willpower with their open center and kind of give that back to you, but your willpower can last longer. That feels defeating when you're a kid and you have no way of speaking up and being heard if that willpower is just being forced upon you all the time.

and it can create that secret life, that rebellion kind of, attitude that happens. So if you're going to use your willpower as an adult with a child or with anybody, and make sure that it really means something to you and that you're not just. Using it because you have it, because it can really crush the spirit of the other person when they feel like they don't have a say, when they feel like they don't have a voice.

So be mindful with it, be careful with it. Be careful with others, and know that while you can commit until you decide you're done, others can't always do that and have grace for them and give grace to the people around you. Let others, Speak up, let others have a say and be willing to negotiate what that looks like.